Thursday, March 08, 2007
why?
okay so ive tried to write this around three times and im feeling really stupid right now. how do i explain what amazing, disapointing, fantabolous, unbelievable and heart-breaking moments in just one entry? i guess another question would be... why would i tell it here?im still wondering why would anyone share their thoughts with out the possibility of every knowing anyone better? why would you give a part of yourself to everyone (who reads your internet blog) and yet expect nothing in return, letting people know you and yet knowing nothing of them? how would that fill you? you just cant simply empty yourself and leave it as that...
OKAY so everything for me right now is as confusing as hell. extremely confusing. i have a lot of stories to tell and they all seem so important to me and yet i know their not really that interesting.
March 1:
we had our the thing...still cant spell it...and it was ultimately really fun. memories here and there. sister acting like her usual self. cooking. cleaning. delivering. preparing food. and simply laughing with friends. all in all it was fun.
went home then it was my sisters birthday and i ate 7 pizzas from pizza hut and all stuffed (the cheese kind lang) it was yummy though i probably shouldnt have eatten it all in one sitting...hehe
March 2:
ohhh yeah....
we were at the lab and ms hebs made kwento about her college days and told a funny story about killing rats and collecting stuf from them. then no clubs today, was happy for that :), and watched this thing na balet well almosted watched.... i kind of fell a sleep at some point. it was okay...
March 3:
went to school then to the mall to eat with sila fran, PDG, angela and rosalyn. then they commented on something on the car ride to angela's and i found it kind of funny...haha i had to stop myself from laughing out loud :P. then we went to angelas and "worked" (which includes eating, ym-ing, playing, working, talking and other stuff they may think of) it browned-out once and we worked by candle light till angela screamed her head out and we followed suit and only then realized she was screaming because the light came back. haha -_- went back to frans house and tambayed till kuya picked me up.
March 4:
bought new glasses
March 5:
well i think that day i fell asleep...hmm yes i think i did...im not really sure...mind is quite blurry about that...
March 6&7:
both really confusing days... was depressed and i know it's not the shrug off king but the really not good kind coz when ever *some* people tried to touch me i felt like taking their hand away, rubbing my skin with sand paper and cleaning it with alcohol. its not their fault in anyway...im just really a freak. well on the 6 i killed ms jose on the evaluation and well when she called me into her office i was like...shit...nalaman kaya nya na ako nagsulat non??? :)) tapos nagjojoke pa kami ng mga malalapit sa pinto na lagot ako...then when ms told me they *a group picked me as one of the people to go to the chem camp i was like -_- then 0_0 the o_O weh!? well really i couldnt believe it... im not the smartest nor the brightest (duh the same thing) so why would they pic me? and now that i think about it its kind of really scary... :( i dont know, i dont do well with strangers... this made me feel lost confused happy ecstatics "special but not really" ...and i already felt lost confused depressed fustrated... that thing just made my life more interesting and yet just the more complicated then before.
March 7 was well today...i mean yesterday and i was again (sorry its so repetitive-->) sad. a series of stuff did that to me and, the worst part of all, i let it. but then again God was actually realy i dont know amazing? i needed to forget and he gave the perfect distraction.
swimming
so that was like the blessing of a life time for me and i forgot everything...honestly. naisip ko lang fall, bend, dive, push friends over the edge of the pool...-_- (*coughfrancough), glid, neste dive...na super sa sakit!!! :)) tapos getting another bukol tapos people asking me kung tama yung dive nila...me asking kung tama yung akin, people just having fun... people smiling... oo nga pala one time during practice ms fe called me and said my kick was strong (parang ako o_O sure di ka bulag or something??) tapos pinadive ako tapos!!! PALPAK!!!!! MAAAN nakakahiya!!! :(( super as in pagkaalis ng paa ko sa edge alam ko nang palpak dive ko -_- bad trip!!!! tapos pina dive naman si lyra ang ganda!!!! so tapos nyon pinaredeam nya daw ako so yon pinadive uli ako so super takot na takot ako kasi baka mali uli nakakahiya na yon:( tapos yon Thank God tumama na so humappy ako. tapos yung tatlong magaling na ayaw aminin (alys, angel at pauline) pina-dive din :) magaganda din sila :D tapos yon...yun araw ko...masaya nadin...
ngayon...be glad you've added to my sadness...you know me more now and i barely know you... it hurts sometimes...just knowing i dont know you and yet we pretend to know each other..you here reading my thoughts... when really all i know about you is your using the internet and you've read till the end.
Labels: confused, emo?, happy, sad, school, thinking
Sunday, October 01, 2006
opinion scanned...deleted (most of it)
visit ---> it's kind of strange. so much has happend yet nothing seems of great value... and yet if you asked me i wouldn't give it up for the world.
things, some people say, happen for a reason. Stuf has happened, that was bound to happen right, and im not sure where to start. this being potentionaly the last entry for this blog I would like to give it some value, to mean something to not only me but to those who have been reading it. and yet sadly I can't even bring myself to admit that i know what I want to wright. that im just afriad to admit that if i write it it would seem like crap..or something to that note. (and ironicaly by writing that here i officialy state it and there for acknowlage the thought...haha stupidity can reach higher levels)
well i should stop blabering and get on to writing.
for the past two or three days there has been a storm called milenya/yo. and so far it has been a pain in the ass. yes. i said ass. becuase not only has it destroyed so many things (the trees in our village and other places, the banners and stuf like that, people who got hurt and others) and has taken away the electricity and water form my home but it has also officialy started my 16th year in this world as being something as a pain in others life. wait before i get into some moppy attitude lets take a gander at all the fun things i did this black out...ironically it wasnt a black out because there was alot of black... so that wasn't out..maybe it should be called a light out...since the light is the ones that's out...diba?
FUN THINGS:
1. we made wax balls (super fun but painful)
2. we ate by candle light
3. saw the stupidity of men...(not sure if that goes on this category but hell its there anyway
4. bought books
5. read chap 7 of ap book
6. got another pimple (yes im vain)
7. sister had a hair cut
8. we played tongits (how ever its spelled)
9. slept in the dark
10. called people up for no reason at all
11. missed something
anyway thats what happened during the blackout
after that (that was thurs and fri) during sat the electricity came back and went to school to study. personaly it was kind of boring. really. the teachers didn't teach to well. What could you expect from the first day right? oh well i'll give them another week or so to get their act together.
for dinner that day we ate turbo-chicken... and mushroom soup from a can...weee...
well thats all... today at sunday i had my hair cut , wanted really short...got something else instead. and ate alot. i dont feel like writing anymore. and if i did it would just be there to make you ask me something so instead i wont and that's all there is to be said anyway.
i guess i wasn't able to bring it justice after all...
sharing sucks...
12th angel came at the right time... it's an amazing co-incidence (i cant spell...just sound it out)